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Yann Marguet – Bigorexia lol

ByJean-Michel

Yann Marguet on France Inter

Humor and criticism about "Tibo InShape" need to stop!

Bigorexia What is it? Here's the explanation:

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No need for him to run long distances; all he had to do was sing "Assis" by Michel Despêches to end up breathless with a nasty stitch. Hello Yann Marié. Hello Mathieu. For over a year now, since I've been working on this show, you've had me discuss mistressange (even though I'm a man without children), queerbaiting (even though I'm straight), mental illness (though, knock on wood, I'm doing okay so far), AIDS (even though I'm HIV-negative), and colorism (even though I'm white). But never, ever, have I felt so illegitimate when I talk about exercise addiction. I'll tell you, I think I'm more Black than athletic; I don't even know where to begin.

I went running once, well, I think, a long time ago, I must have been a kid, and even then the activity wasn't exactly thrilling. I mean, what's with all these people who run? Running is supposed to be about getting somewhere, fast, to the train station, the airport, somewhere safe. But no, these running fanatics leave from their house, you know, to go where? They run around their house, in a loop, the idiots. Yeah, but after 30 minutes, you forget you're running, it becomes amazing. 30 MINUTES! It's like those TV shows, they tell you, it gets incredible from episode 8 onwards. 

Well, we have to admit we're a little jealous, we who suffer from more lurid addictions like cigarettes, alcohol, or, like Cyril Lacarrière, getting prostate massages while reading woke comments on the France Info website. We can't help but think that in the land of junkies, the bigorexics are kings. And I'm not denying the suffering and distress of some whose lives have been severely impacted by excessive exercise, but honestly, when I read that "bichente," "isarazu," and "bigorexique"—sorry, "bixente"—put them side-by-side with a Kraket on the subway, I know which addiction I'll choose: surfing and protein shakes. Speaking of which, one day I was at my mom's, and as a trial run, there were only protein bars. I thought they were incredibly good, and since then, I eat them regularly even though I don't do any exercise. So, that's just to tell you how little I care anymore. 

No, but athletes, calm down a bit with this idea of the perfect body, what is the perfect body, Kendall Jenner, Son Goku, Schwartzi, bodybuilders, excuse me but bodybuilding, it's still the only discipline where you have to look like you're good at sports, but when it comes to competition, you shouldn't do it, it's like if in F1, we judged the cars while they were standing still and said "the one that looks the fastest won".

Honestly, doping, drying out, hurting your body and eating stuff that looks like what Thomas Pesquet eats when he's in the spas, is it really worth it? While preparing this column, I was even reading testimonials from children who go to the gym. Listen to this, on France 3 Normandy, while most kids are playing soccer, Charlotte and Louis, ELEVEN YEARS OLD, are doing squats, then rowing, then burpees. Making 11-year-olds do burpees? Calling UNICEF? It's unbelievable! Where do we need muscular children? What is this? Is this the Third Reich? CrossFit rescue for children, I quote. Charlotte loves it. Her goal is to build some muscle, to have a nice body. But where is she going? To a children's nightclub? To a swingers' Mickey Mouse Club? Come on, calm down with Thibaut Inchape on YouTube. Don't forget that he's living proof that you can change your body, but not your face. Come on, understand me, understand me. I respect Inchape's side of things, it's clear we... You can see it clearly, but admit that the Thibaut side is still very present in the supra-trapezoidal part of the body, and then these people, just like actors, don't forget that it's their life, that they are paid to do it and that they do it with all the necessary support.

Okay, I know I haven't been much help, my dear bigots, but then again, it's not like France Inter is the number one fitness radio station. Between a Fabrice Drouelle story and the latest Dao, it's no wonder you're not listening while attempting a 185 kg reverse powerlift. Anyway, it's not a big deal, take care, and have a good weekend. Saturday, Friday, and Saturday at the open mic night in Paris, but do I really need to remind you, dear listeners, to civilize the world? You're already aware of an excellent profile, well done, champ.

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